Saturday, October 08, 2016

The US Election

US elections have never impressed me. They're too much like English elections - all sound and fury and signifying more of the same. At least back in the 'good old days' you got a free drink for casting a ballot - either way,  and there were some election day 'shenanigans' to be had. Now all the fun is gone.

 America has always had this 'royalty' thing, where they consecrate whoever gets the electoral nod with having odorless shit for  four, or eight years. The 'Office of the President' is a holy place.  So in times past, if the candidate was a rum-tugger - as quite a few have been - or a skirt chaser as another few have been,  or even if he had some 'unique personal habits' or a 'delayed sexuality' as more than a few of the rest did, then 'polite' society would keep it under the bonnet o' freedumb.  Much like royal families tended to dress up their obvious weaklings in extra padding, or hide them away if the opportunity arose.

The last 'good' election was that one which swept JFK into office, not so much because I was aware of the nuances,  but more so because my dear old Catholic Mom was so excited, as so seemed to be a large number of 'ordinary' Americans, that a young man, a Catholic, an 'irishman' and a war hero were taking the helm of America's ship of state. It was only later, after some patriot had brained him, that we found out his Daddy had used mob connections  and some of the family millions to possibly play 'jiggery pokery' with the election process.  Kennedy won that election to the joy of everyone and, if he ran true to his secret form, celebrated by dipping his wick in a party volunteer, or two, before wiping himself off on the hotel-room drapery.  He was the last boy scout.

Since then 'feet of clay'  have been the most prominent features of America's 'Chief Magistrates'. Some of them have been crooks, or rogues or charlatans, some ordinary men out of their depth or mere bumblers. And one has been a professional actor.

If the Adams,  Jeffersons, Washingtons and Lincolns were more than mere mortals - their like has not been seen again.  But hey, we've even managed to dish some dirt on some of them, too.

In a nation that has managed to 'cope' with 'Father Feltus' and CBS exposes of wannabe kiddie-porkers from every walk of life,  what kind of a surprise would it be to find out that one of the two latest candidates thinks about, and speaks of his ability to 'grab the girls by the pussy'  because "he's a star" and "they let you do that".   I would hope that the past decade has proven to him that while you can still grab them by anything you like, most of them will run to the media - on the way to the lawyers' office.   But, hey, there is still the 'star power' of the oval orifice - one of the greatest 'analgesicks' of all time - and Melania has to sleep sometime.

 Would we be any less shocked to hear that the other candidate has a predilection for getting money? Most 'decent' Americas share that attribute.  Granted Croesus might have been a 'proto American' but many of them have well-outpaced him, wealth-wise. The shocker here is that the Russians have hacked into somebody's secret emails again and now Wikileaks is trying to disrupt the election by printing things the US media 'didn't know about'  - like State Department  approval for selling-off US uranium production to a Russian oligarch - and somebody's 'charitable foundation getting a hefty donation from him. Apparently Putin's got more to come.

 But none of this changes the fact that America  - not Putin - has set itself up for a choice between  'bad and worse', or possibly 'dumb and dumber'.

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