The Right Hand Knoweth not What the Left Hand Scratcheth

Hardly has fey blade Guy Giorno left the Prime Minister's Office than the caca whacks into the big turney thing. Minister of Foreign Affairs, Larry Cannon, who had been involved for months with Emirate and Etihad Airlines negotiating extended landing rights at Canadian Airports, took the side of Air Canada that such an extension was 'bad for business' and promptly got Canada kicked out of its middle east supply base in Dubai.

The eviction was so sudden that the Minister of Defence, the CinC and the Veterans Affairs Minister found themselves having to fly on to Rome when a planned stop at Base Mirage was panned by the Emiris. The three had been winging it back home for Thanksgiving when the Emirates terminated their air transit rights.

Now the mlitary has 27 days to get their crap out of town. So that means the Ukrainians are going to make a bundle (again) renting us some Ruslans to transport the material to a new supply base in Cyprus or Turkey. Well, what the hey, we were planning to pull out of 'Mirage' anyway. The contract with the Emirates had been allowed to lapse back in June.

But talk about ungrateful, eh? After DoD has spent all that money flying grieving families, and VIPs, out to the middle east 'staging area' on their way to Kandahar, first class on the 'deluxe'  Emirate Airlines A380's. You'd think all that business would be worth more than mere 'skywards points'. But then Emirate is the only airline, including our flagship Air Canada, flying direct from AbuDhabi to Canada. As such,  it already attracts more than its share of  flying customers - i.e. anybody wishing to avoid an extra stop in Europe. And with what 27 000 Canadians residing in the Emirates - why not? Duty free is as cheap, or cheaper, than in Europe anyway, as is the cost of the ticket.

But where does that leave our soldiers - whose every Joe and Louis, not to mention all the other military unmentionables, have to come through Mirage, or some awkwardly busy US base? Well, not to  fear, says the DoD. All those frozen Timbits are already being routed through Akrotiri or Dhekelia anyway. From there it's just a short whiz across Turkey, and a couple of former Russian -stans before jetting over the Pamirs into sunny Kandahar. Hardly take a gallon more of Avgas. And, besides, those Cypriots have soft spot for Canuck 'peacekeepers', especially the drunk kind, decompressing with some combat pay in their pocket. A fellow can have a high time with those Moldavan tourist gals or sun-worshipping Baltic types, unless, he gets punchy and upsets their Cypriot 'boyfriends'. There's been more than one Canuck run afoul a Cypriot slammer after a little post-roto celebration.

So if it's no problem for the military, why should it be a problem for anybody else, eh? If the soldiers aren't complaining, why should those who have so much pre-paid freedom? Well,  maybe it's because this is just how Steve Harper and his gang of merry idiots operate, by pissing people off. Sure it's ok to do that in Canada, liberals deserve it anyway. But when you start pissing off people in other parts of the world out of pure stupidity, well where does that end? **It might just mess-up your plans to put a Canadian ass in the catbird seat at the Security Council. Multicultural inclusivity aside, Canada has developed a reputation that aligns it with what is considered, by some, to be the only 'force for good' in the world. So that means many of  those other 'little' voters at the UN are going to blackball you on principle.

As if getting blackballed by AbuDhabi isn't blackballing enough.

** Like psychotic or what? It was just announced that Canada is 'giving up' its effort to gain a seat on the Security Council. This would have been the first time in 50 years that Canada has sat on that body. Harper invested two speeches at UN forums and sent Larry Cannon to New York to schmooze up some support. I would imagine that the Abu Dhabi kerfluffle has put paid to the bumming about a Canadian in the president's chair next year. Sort of reminiscent of the doofus who 'owned the mountain', and the doofi who 'owned the podium', at last year's Olympics. Gotta love those Tories, they're all talk, as long as there's a buck in it.

Here They Go Again

In the words of Ronnie Reagan who put the kibosh on that silly old democrat Carter's stab at middle east peace, "There he goes again!"

The latest silly old democrat in the White House is trying to resuscitate a process started more than twenty years ago. In the meantime a lot of water has flowed under the Allenby Bridge, enough to sink the current process for a long time to come.

To begin with, in the dim days of yore, there hadn't been any antifadas, the Buchenwald of the present, no terrorist bombs at pizzerias or on buses to pose an existentialist threat to Israelis. There have been since, and the current 'boogey' is rockets - ranging from home-made skyrockets to the latest product of Iranian rocket factories (or so we're told).

Iran wasn't a problem back then, either but to-day we're being told it's problem number one - there can't be peace in Palestine with Iran un-chastened. Iran hadn't become Jimmy's nightmare, and Ronnie's election winner,  when Begin met Arafat at Camp David for the kick-off. But Iran is Benny Netanyahu's big 'bug-a-boo' and Iran won't let  Abu Mazen quietly sell-off the 'birthright' of some Palestinians to get a quick deal with Israel.

That 'deal' with Israel has transmogrified too. Whereas, back in the old days, the Israelis might have been inclined to 'give back' most of the west bank and shared access to part of Jerusalem to a Palestinian 'tribal homeland' in return for peace. Now, it has settled most of the high ground in the West bank and any part of Jerusalem is now 'off the table'. Peace isn't the target any more - it's having a nation of pacified 'step'n fetchits' to do the dog work or, preferably, to have them all gone; replaced with Thai workers and Belarussian au pairs. What's being offered to some Palestinians is a ' cash buy out' and some nice property in the Negev. Some Palestinians, because most Palestinians are going to get nothing beside the opportunity to cram into a smaller 'homeland' than they have now. And refugee Palestinians are going to get nothing at all save a future in those squatter camps or emigration to other parts of the world. Hey, look what a diaspora did for the children of Israel, nu?.

Another large 'fly in the oinkum' is the HAMAS organization. When Jimmy met Anwar and Menachem there wasn't any HAMAS. FATAH and Yassir ruled the Palestinian roost and Arafat was on his way to shedding a terrorist image,  much as Menachem had, to reach statesman level. In the interim, after what were seen to be failed exercises in liberation, with a PLO getting fat and sluggish on UN and Israeli money, the Palestinians largely voted them out of office after Arafat died. It was only some timely Israeli police intervention that held the West Bank.Gaza 'went' and, after the settlers had left nothing behind when they were removed , it would take some on-going military action to keep Gaza under control. Even a US-inspired police action went awry when Hamas stole a convoy load of munitions  intended for FATAH security that the Israelis had carelessly allowed into Gaza. Whatever deal AbuMazen buys would have to be sold in Gaza. But as with Iran, Israel and the US will do their darnedest to isolate HAMAS in Gaza. Bottom line, it would have to be an outstanding deal for Abu Mazen to be 'bought' in the west Bank, either - or there's another wave of Palestinian refugees on the way.

Personally, I don't think Netanyahu will risk what his daddy thinks about him, by making peace with anybody. If he's successful it will be at the expense of Iran, which, he will claim, has to be removed as a precondition to any peace settlement. To get FATAH and the US on-side he's apt to say that everything from east Jerusalem to a return of all refugees is 'on the table',  but there'll be no discussion until the mullahs in Teheran have no teeth, or voice.

Obama is just letting himself in for a great disappointment. But he will have a 'Tony Blair opportunity' to 'do the right thing' by blasting Iran first. Then he'll get to see how Mr. Netanyahu works. We all will, too, if we're still here.

Can ya smell  ARMAGEDDON?

That Does It - I'm monetizing

To-day's Toronto Star tells the tale of a reformed pervert who made $100 000 last year making videos of like-minded individuals reconnecting with their inner Peter Pan by driving home-made 'stunt vehicles' around his farm. It appears he was sole owner, producer, etc of a UTube 'hit', or rather something that got  thousands of them. So many that UTube paid him a great deal of money for his uploads.

The Star seems to have dropped the story. here's a different reference:
jalopnik

But it seems that somebody who saw his stuff remembered him from the bad old days of early videography. Seems that Farmer Brown was in on the ground floor of digital imaging and directed the all-revealing lens to a couple of fey blades he conjured into a bout of Onanism. He claims that his as-yet-undiagnosed manic-depression was the cause of his reaching out to fondle some flopping 'genitools' - again on camera. That got him a conviction for child molestation, for he was 26 at the time and the pud-pullers were still too young to be doing that for a living. Some of those who knew him then, are expressing concern that young men might be attracted to his 'rides' and leave themselves open to other 'experiences', if Farmer Brown is still bent in that former direction.

For his part,  Brown is 'coming clean' at this juncture so that  he can improve his chances of being reunited with his 'estranged children' . That's a laudable sentiment, if not a little bit late, but probably due to that lithium deficiency. He didn't say what estranged them. It strikes me that you have to be doing something a little off-side of the centre spot to be having your children 'estranged' from you. Courts these days are quite understanding, even if there is mental illness at play, unless it's the kind that results in some physical violence or abuse.

I'd be concerned that Farmer Brown seems to see a value in running a place with the motto 'Where boys become men, and men become boys'".

All this has given me pause to consider that one can actually pull down a six-figure income slapping some videos on the internet - which explains some of the stuff that bubbles up from time to time, and that 'asshole craze' that made some young idiots wealthy endangering themselves. Maybe there's a place for scruffy curmudgeon barging about the vicissitudes of life. Nope, I understand somebody from Yonkers - with a wife beater over his beer gut -  has that spot nailed shut.

Maybe I'll monetize this stuff, with the audience I've got  I'll be wealthy in another lifetime.

Dudley Strikes/Struck Again

Canada's best loved icons, barring Bucky the Beaver or some of those 'commando' fiddlers from down-east, have dropped themselves in the doo-doo of hubris once again.

This time Canada's singular police force, cum intelligence service, cum embassy guards battalion, cum only cavalry unit, are being pasted in the press for their interference with, and kiboshing of,  the investigation of wee Willie Picton, the pork farmer of Port Coquitlam. It seems that the 'people in red', either ignored the information presented by other police, or dragged their feet on their own investigation enough to allow Willie to ply his trade in up to 30 additional cases of  'rendering'.

willie gets porked

As one policeman testified at the investigation "You can't tell the RCMP anything, they know it all." Well he's sort of half right, being as since they know it all already, it's far better to drop them a few hints and allow them to use the skills acquired from King of the Mounties and Sgt. Preston of the Yukon, to come up with the facts for themselves. For anything anybody else might 'know' isn't worth a bridle full of horse saliva to 'those with real horse sense'. It's a good idea to steer clear while they pursue their 'investigations', too.

Bummer is that the Picton investigation went the same way as some other Mounted investigations - i.e. south. This leads one to believe that 'investigating' isn't their strong suit and might be fodder for an different government enterprise - like a Federal Bureau of Investigation, say? On the upside, these 'fodder' spin-offs, like CSIS, are fields for applied Mountyism - places where retiring red coats  can go to be with others who share the esprit, if not the big hat. It doesn't dawn on anybody that making incompetent ex-Mounties the head honchos in some equally important services isn't just letting them breed more of those like unto themselves? That Mountie 'culture' is going with them and this inquiry  points out, again,  that the 'culture' is at the root of the force's problems. It's stopping them from doing their jobs.

So what is to be done? Well changing the 'hetman' didn't work. The 'cossacks rouges' took three years to discover he was a 'pouf' and to work up the gumption to say something about it. They probably weren't in favour of any substantive changes either, especially if it involved not considering themselves commanding the bestest and smartest - if not the most best-looking police in the world. Even then,  they went puling to the Minister, himself a wanker of the first water, before ultimately leaking their tale of woe, anonymously, to the press. Nobody wanted to fall on their cavalry lance and risk a pension for the good of  the force. That there are ponces running the government who are trying to run 'the mounted', is only coincidental.

I think the only way out of the mess, aside from letting them carry on in the 'fine tradition', etc,  is to turn them into a latter day Corps of Commissionaires. Keep the uniforms, they're sharp. But put them where they won't be doing any harm, like at holding doors at public events and citizenship courts, decorating foreign affairs soirees and ambassadorial banquets, checking the bona fides of visitors at Parliament Hill and in the opposition parties' caucus rooms. As far as training foreign police services, well, unless they would like a mounted performance unit - and a lot of places would like one of those,  like the red indians, cossacks or the bashi-bazouks, the Khyber Rifles and the Spahis - lots of opportunities. The Mounties, however, shouldn't be teaching anybody about investigating.

Up to the Neck in It

The monsoons weren't kind to Pakistan this year. The 'rainy' season caused notable damage in a lot of places. It might give pause to consider more of that 'extremes of weather' stuff Al Gore was pontificating about, if 'right thinking' individuals weren't convinced that extreme weather happens all the time. But I digress. It's not so much that the monsoon, this year, created a mess, it's the effect of that.

Pakistan is a unique country running from the Himalayas in the north, generally downhill to the south-west to the Indian ocean. And that is how the monsoon took it. Beginning with heavy rains in the mountainous north-east provinces, the mountain streams and rivers rapidly swelled their banks. The deluge swept away villages and left survivors stranded on high ground without food or shelter. It was almost a week before we, in the west, started hearing stories of the devastation. Among the first were that the 'taliban' were "taking advantage" of the situation by aiding those affected and that the Pakistani government had no resources nearby to help. Subsequent stories told of floods spreading to the central parts of the country, of dams washing away and again thousands stranded with no help. By that time NATO (the US ) had diverted six helicopters from Afghanistan - these were promptly grounded by bad weather - and the Pakistanis were diverting military helicopters to rescue work. Aside from that, it was noted that western aid was not arriving in any great quantity.

In the west, the story of the Pakistani floods received the same attention as the Chinese floods, or the Mexican floods, very little at all. The President of Pakistan, on a sort-of royal progress around the family estates in France actually got more press for nay-saying the war in Afghanistan. That 'normal' outburst of generous  appealing,  pledging and sending off airlifts of aid seen in other recent disasters just didn't happen this time. Just the opposite in fact - the 'where are all the muslims'  chorus went up.

Along with it was the tooth-sucking about the effect on the war - that the 'taliban' had somehow not been affected by the flood and were 'on the road' to taking back all the areas the government had destroyed fighting them for the past two years. The weather was even taking a toll on the drone strikes which only managed to kill a half company of insurgents. And there was expressed the fear that those nasty 'Talies' would be taking any resources given to the flood victims, so best not to give them anything at all. Let the taliban feed them from their ration dumps. Actually, this is a close to the truth as you're going to get, for those people ARE the 'Taliban', all of them. Now they're wet, cold, out in the open and they have nothing to eat but their kalashikovs, so it's a golden opportunity to put the kibosh on the insurgency with some benign neglect or 'grub for actionable intel' program.

Now the flooding is reaching into the more 'advanced' areas of the Pakistani south and, at last, the clarion call to assist is being blatted quietly. America, as usual, is leading the pack with a promised 100 million in humanitarian aid. Even Canada has 'promised' 33 million - but that's probably money we had already promised and I wouldn't count on a dime until the cheque gets cashed. Our Conservative government is big on letting the little guy pay first and then forgetting to cut the cheque themselves. We haven't heard yet from Franklin Graham's international 'ministry', but maybe they've got their hands full and warehouses emptying, getting Haiti ready for more of the same old, same old but with the real American Jesus and less of that MauMau juju papist stuff. Muslim organizations are mobilizing to send help, at least the ones that haven't been placed on the international blackball of terror list. This is where those 'sanctions' really start paying-off! Too bad it wasn't as wet in Iran. Maybe next time.

Canada's Shreiking Meemie

I just read a piece in the Toronto sun about Khadr, the Canadian child-mujaheddin who has been growing into adulthood in Gitmo for the last 8 years. The writer of the piece, one Ezra Levant, wonders why anybody could be feeling the least bit bad about Khadr since, according to Levant, he's been the recipient of all things good while he's been staying in that Caribbean workers' paradise. Levant would have us believe he's been molly-coddled, not only by overly kindly guards who attend zealously to his religious strictures in regard to prayer and feeding, but by the Canadian government's department of foreign affairs who send him regular "care packages" at taxpayer expense along with goodies provided by an admiring family. This little terrorist has had too many treats.

Levant describes the idyllic life  of  Khadr and his ilk, with opportunities for exercise, if they wish, and expensive high-fashion athletic footware, but also nintendo and electronic time-wasters laid on by caring Marines. No doubt he's an accomplished 'killer' at "COD5 Modern War".

How all this is known unto Ezra is probably due to his exposure to 'Fox-think' in the bastion of freedom. To round-off his little piece, Ezra spits out one last sunflower shell in the form of the arcane knowledge that the IEP that killed the first Canadian to die in Afghanistan was assembled by another 'child-terrorist'. How does he know that? The man is truly amazing.

How did Ezra get to be so smart, you might ask. Well, that was due to his upbringing. Ezra is the grandchild of Russian Jewish emigrants who homesteaded out to the Canadian west to find a new life. Whatever their new life was about, Ezra managed to attend Jewish school  and later took his degree in law from  the U. of Alberta. At a young age he developed a negative sensitivity for those who might get an easier (free?) ride due to their 'special' circumstances. This offended Ezra so much that he led the charge to overturn some civil rights and equal-opportunity nonsense the university had started. Ezra became a poster-boy for the reactive right. Lashing out to restore a sense of real social value and the natural aristocracy of the smart.

This led Ezra to configure himself as a 'conservative thinker' - he dislikes anything 'special' - like unions, Quebec, or anything east of Winnipeg. He wants government to get rid of those hindrances to progress - like the minimum wage, universal health care, public pensions and subsidized education. Ezra might very well hallucinate that Canada could add 10 new stars to the 'spangled banner' not to mention a few territories and a whole whack of cheap resources that the 'talented' could better manage in lieu of the socialists. One might almost think he aspires to join the constellation of holy hebrews who wag the dog in Washington. Along with all this arcane baggage, Ezra holds a little bit of a hate for such as Khadr.

It could be because of all the free medical and dental care he has received at Gitmo. It could be because Khadr's family have piled on the Canadian haywagon much as did gran-bubbi, only with far more public assistance (an unnecessary social innovation in them days) . Or it could be that Khadr's gotten all this notice and press about being the youngest terrorist to be 'tagged' by America. Or, finally, it could be that Khadr seems, to this point, to be a far more sympathetic character than some pudgy prick of a western lawyer. At least Khadr had the moxie to bounce back from a USAF bomb strike, a SF assault and three of their best in his back. Not only that, cheeky bugger, he had the fearful temerity to, reputedly, toss a hand grenade that, supposedly, killed a "medic" and all-round nice-guy and dad who happened to be in the assault squad that day.

To Levant, this is all chapter and verse - even though there are members of the assault squad who deny the 'conventional wisdom' of the 'action report' - twice written and filed months late. Khadr is guilty because he was caught on a video tape miraculously found on the battlefield afterward, and because he 'fessed-up' to 'friendly' American guards, one of whom was discharged for beating an innocent Afghan taxi-driver to death. Levant is right only in saying, in his blog, "Canada's little terrorist is as good as done."

Khadr can't not be found guilty - there's an empire at stake.

If there's anything that we shouldn't be 'crying' for Khadr about,  it is that he has such antagonists as Ezra Levant. I'd like to think that when Khadr thinks of his God taking revenge on his persecutors that he's thinking of assholes like Levant. We should be crying for ourselves, for, all too often, that 'revenge' falls on the innocent, not the bigmouths who might truly deserve it.

No Honour Among Thieves: Buyers and Sellers Either

One of  Toronto's more picaresque attractions are the TV advertisements by those who offer "cash for gold". There are two in particular Russell Oliver - who's been a provider of chintzy TV ads for a number of years, and a recently independent protege, one Harold the Jewelry Buyer. There are others,  a mail-in-your-old-jewelry-and-we'll-cut-you-the-cheque outfit and, apparently, the subject of this story.

http://www.thestar.com/news/gta/article/844356--cash-for-gold-employee-charged-in-alleged-murder-plot

It strikes me that societal circumstances must have reverted to a previous time when 'jewelry buyers' and pawn shops are becoming more noticeable (and reputable?) again. There is now a series on the A&E channel about a pawn family in Las Vegas - some of whose members bear a striking resemblance to other more notable 'bounty-hunting' and chopper-building' dynasties, or to the Munsters of comedic fame.

What's  humorous in all these is their stereotypicality. 'Dog, the Bounty Hunter' his blowsy missus, his tatted and pigtailed trailer-trash progeny are one-ers. As are the mustachioed and muscle-bound biker building family - except for the one overweight 'nerd' among them. These are modern-day replacements for the 'rasslers' of past times. The 'pawners' are larger than life too, with a coterie of experts and advisors who look like the came straight from a Bob Crumb comic. And no less are Russell the "Loan arranger" Peters (Oliver) and Harold the Schmuck.

Oliver has been around longer than the other, but longevity hasn't improved him, or apparently, his service. Here's one of his ads:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSQVVHyvOZU&feature=related

Russ Oliver has some bad press for his attempted rip-offs and apparently lousy 'bedside manner'. He did however raise Harold to manhood, or at least the position to want to go it alone. Harold doesn't have the flash, but he does an outstanding rendition of Shylock. Here's one of his efforts:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UnRno6z2Xc

One could imagine somebodies  like Harold, or Russell being in the Temple courtyard the day Jesus 'lost it'.

To-day's story  puts a another  slant on things. There aren't enough people peddling granny's old adornments, or there are too many buyers jacking up the price, for these guys. And so we have equally colorful 'extreme fighters' claiming to be hired to knock-off the opposition - by Granny of all people! You can't buy advertising like that.


It really isn't surprising when one considers that Bathurst Street in Toronto, once the quaint heart of a little shtetl, has grown like a beanstalk that extends Toronto's Judenrat for some 40 miles through the city and out into the hinterland.  Not much in the 'news' about it, but Toronto's Jewish community has grown, obviously as quickly,  if not far more prosperously, than some of the others. Russell and Harold are part of a 'vibrant' religious and socio-economic scene, even if they do from time to time want to kill each other. The 'schwarzers'  do that with striking regularity.

The High cost of Plantation

An article in the Toronto Star yesterday caught my attention, it was titled "Funeral Homes Subsidizing Services for the Poor". Being the altruist that I am and having gone through the funeral process fairly recently, this act of corporate largesse just grabbed me. But I'm working on the principle that nothing makes a funeral home sadder than to sit empty, and any funeral is better for business than no funeral.

It seems that local funeral homes in Toronto are 'up against the wall', cost-wise, in providing a ]decent] funeral for the 'poor', for less than $5 500. They want the City to up the basic rate for a 'paupers' funeral from $2 208 to cover that amount. Last year they claim to have 'lost' millions on the 1 600  'freebies' they 'had to' give those who died while on social assistance, or disability pensions.

Needless to say, most of those funerals were of the 'full service' type because there were 'family' involved. I'm making an assumption here, but I'd guess none of the 'family involved' were in a position to actually pay anything toward the costs themselves?

So what's included? Because the family must be  'respected'  here. "Most get pickup, embalming, a particleboard casket covered by grey cloth with white rayon interior, a service, clergy honorarium, a hearse, “lead car” and limo for family, and burial or cremation." If the cost for that is $5 500 + tax, then the $13 000 paid for a recently deceased relative must have been increased by more than double - the extra costs of 'viewing', 'deluxe' coffin and a grave liner.

Under legislation,  municipalities are "allowed"  to cover these costs with 80% being supplied by the province. This for families who are "unable to bury a loved one as they would like".

Strikes me that one of the effects of  'poverty' is not being able to do a lot of things you would like. But having a funeral 'show' for an indigent family member, on the public tick, I don't think should be one of them. I guess the same problem of not having the foresight to realize that you can't not work and expect the grocery man to drop a load at the door, carries over into the realization that we are all finite and the day will come when our carcass, or dear old dad's,  must be disposed.  That a whole 'family' (for I'm making an assumption that this wouldn't get done for the sake of a surviving parent, brother, sister or cousin) couldn't work together to bury their dead, is a sad commentary on to-day's world. But then, if they did that, they'd probably get charged the going rate. The costs of those 'basic' funeral services, which aren't available to the paying public, would be heftily inflated. If somebody else is going to pay for it, why volunteer? And I don't think the funeral industry is being too altruistic either.

One thing most funeral directors in business aren't, is stupid. That variety don't stay in business long. So I'm imagining that, like many businessmen who 'give to charity', funeral homes put some of those 'operating expenses' over to those who can pay, or as a 'business expense' against taxes, or maybe a bit of both. I would also imagine that, depending on location, some funeral homes would get more of the 'pauper' trade than others. And the subsidy, then, would constitute a business hardship, in terms of a lack of higher 'regular' rates than those funeral homes get, who only bury the well-heeled. So the problem wouldn't be industry-wide, or equitably distributed.

Why, then, the necessity for government involvement? The funeral business has a number of internal organizations to which individuals can belong, and for a number of purposes. Why don't they fund an insurance plan to cover those increased basic costs for the few (?) affected? Just because the government undertakes to provide the necessities of life to those unable to do so for themselves doesn't make it a logical follow-up that government should provide the industry standard in funerary practices too. 'Bury the dead' is a corporal work of mercy enjoined on all, but in our neo-pagan society this religious tenet has been parlayed into a social event, with concommitent opportunities for the ultimate 'show', which, in the industry, is the icing on the monetary cake. Poverty defines a limit on the amount of that

The government shouldn't be in the business of providing more than the 'paupers' funeral'. If  'the family'  want more, they should plan for it, and save for it or, as so many others do, go into debt for it.

When It's Summer in the Rockies

The national guardians are at it again. After pulling off a brilliant eclat at the Winter Olympics and an interesting riposte at the recent Ontario summits, the RCMP have begun to look inward. and what they see, they don't like. Well, not so much see - for the red serge and cavalry stripes always look sharp, it's more what they hear that they dislike. It seems their head honcho is a 'yeller' fer petes' sakes!

The wunderkind civilian overseer of the mounties, one 'wild bill' Elliot, who was appointed to 'make changes' in the RCMP three years ago, has turned out to be every bit the 'martinet' the last honcho was, and he's a screamer forbye! At present he has an upper echelon revolt of sorts on his hands, or rather on the hands of his boss Vic 'moustache pete'  Toews. It appears some higher-ranking Mounties, after complaining to him, decided to do their complaining in the press. They no doubt will be among the most substantive changes in the Mounties for, after embarrassing Vic, who's usually asleep at the switch anyway, they've got 'the screamer' in trouble, too and a civil service inquiry into the 'poisoned environment'.

The scoop, as the papers are reporting, is that Elliot's management style leaves something to be desired. Whatever his background, his training led him to believe that the 'fuhrerprinzip' was best, complete with public 'bawlings-out' of those who displease him. One would think that such management behavior isn't a recently acquired strategy and might have been noticed in his other appointments. But then again, he's more than likely viewed as an unqualified therapist sticking his big nose in where it can't do much good and the notion of a laugh at his expense couldn't be much amiss. On his part he claims that some of his critics are resistant to the kind of change he's taking so long to introduce. Cleaning house shouldn't take so long, and generally the more noise involved, the less 'cleaning' actually gets done.

It sounds like the 'imperium' kicked-in, as it so often does when mere mortals get promoted to greatness.  Elliot probably got to like the snappy salutes from his 'boys', his service did qualify him for the Award of Police Merit.Which is right up there with Elvis' collection of police badges - he was probably an honorary Mountie, though Elliot has, yet, become that. What he does have, along with the golden buttons and crest on his 'official' blazer, is the 'stick of greatness' - the Commissioner's baton. For other Commissioners this was a commonplace sort of thing, but for our 'shrieker' the baton has become, literally a caber, a two-hander if anything, or else he lacks the stature, as well as the 'quals', of others.

Those deputy commissioners are largely those raised in the school of Ghirardelli  the former honcho at RCMP. A fat ex-civil servant cutting the orders probably rankles like heck.  Or maybe all this is being orchestrated for the best cop in Canada - 'Julius Caesar' Fantino. Fantino let it out fairly recently that he was not considering a run in politics after he put aside the swat outfit at the OPP. And what a wonderful improvement in look, the red coat of a Canadian icon!  But Julian's 'grandeur' would put Ghirardelli's to shame, for Julian is a true Roi Soleil and any house-keeping he would do there would probably be of the empire-building kind.

Don't expect much different from the Mounties for the foreseeable future.

AIDS Redux - the Sequel

The annual world-wide AIDS competition, er, conference is wrapping up this week. The annual gathering of all those with a stake, or an interest in the plague of the 21st century were gathered in Vienna to hear the hopeful news (not much), to get the latest in alerts (women and young people seem to be in particular danger this year) and to hear the latest in excuses.

 In the past we've had ignorance, then poverty, and lack of medications to add to the other excuses for the spread of AIDS - risky sexual behaviors and intravenous drug use. This year the 'boogieman' thwarting the stoppage of AIDS is a lack of human rights.

It seems that in countries where the powers that be can do anything they want to individuals, those suffering with AIDS are very reticent to step forward. The fear of physical punishment and or imprisonment, or even death leaves them to develop full-blown illness and then die when retrovirals could slow that progression so they could have longer lives trying to eke out a living. When I hear that, I think of tyrannies like they have in Cuba where there may be no civil rights, but the treatment for AIDS patients is world-class. The big difference is that those diagnosed with AIDS are no longer at large to mix with those who don't have the disease. If freedom to infect others is a bench mark of human rights for AIDS sufferers, sign me up for the school that uses firing squads. I don't think anybody has the 'right' to give anybody else an incurable disease - especially one requiring intimate contact or exchange of body fluids  for transmission. It's not quite the same as sneezing on a bus. In actuality, however, I think the human rights thing is a red herring.

The real problem, and the one as yet un-addressed is that, once infected with AIDS, you have, on average, three years before the disease progresses far enough to make you feel like you need a doctor's attention. In that period, the viral load in your blood may be growing steadily, but you're not sick enough to think that you might be spreading anything worse than spit and semen. It is these folk with AIDS, who don't yet know they have it, who are causing the undiminished 'new infection' rate of about 12 percent. With the exception of the few odd cases where someone deliberately infects others, most people with AIDS are very careful about not transmitting it to friends and others intimate with them. But as yet there is nothing the AIDS body is willing to do that would address this issue, other than to encourage wide-spread AIDS 'education'. Lesson one of that course is that 'we' have nothing to fear from people with AIDS - the ones who know they have it at least. And the rest? Well, if you're doing 'risky business', you should get yourself tested and vulcanize yourself.

So the well-paid activists, spokespersons and workers in AIDs-directed charities and NGOs can pat themselves on the back for another years' work done. They can waggle fingers at governments who aren't kicking-in as much as they might. And 'tsk-tsk' about the tragedies. When it comes to serving useless purposes they are well up there, for the only thing they 'do' is an annual 'awareness' of our insufficiencies. As if the world could forget.

Even Better than C-17's

It was announced this week that the Canadian government was all set to buy a couple of wings worth of the almost new F35 Lightning 2. This marvel of aeronautical engineering and fighter for the vandouzieme century, has been a-borning since the 70's and, at last, it's almost ready for production. Being as since there are only a couple of other such "5th generation" hi-tech stealth aircraft on the market these days and having joined the developmental consortium a number of years, and millions of dollars ago, the F35 is really Canada's only choice. The US has a 'better' model - the F22 - but they're keeping that one for themselves and gallant l'il Israel - even though Obama thinks he's scrapped it. The Russkis have a similar (cheaper) machine in the works, but we don't do deals with terror, or commies,  the same way we missed buying all those Ruslans we still rent.

No, we're bound and bent to buy the Lightning 2 just like a US general said we were going to do some 12 years back. We don't get any choice - not if we don't want a whole shitload of trade problems. Never mind the fact that, given its comparatively short range, we'll have to be messing-up its vaunted stealth characteristics with a load of external fuel tanks. The single engine should provide better fuel economy than the double units in the CF18 and the F22, but zipping over the barren north won't be as worry-free, if that single mill goes out, there's only one other way down. But what the hell,  they make really good jet engines these days.

It was picturesque to see our 'civilian warrior', the devilishly handsome Minister of Defence, trying on the cockpit of one of the babies. I bet he never had the willies like that since his days in the video arcade. Sitting on all that raw power would be better than humping a Secretary of State or 'doing a circuit' on the star of the Stronach stable. We, in Canada, are fortunate to have a 'first soldier' who's cut to the rig of a Reinhard Heydrich, rather than someone who looks like Elmer Fudd and sounds like a relative of Porky Pig.

But don't let the photo-op fool anybody there's money to be spent here - 9 billion dollars (16 billion according to other sources) , the deal is pegged at. If you'll do some simple mathematics - by comparison to the 4 billion dollars we 'paid' for three C-17's, you'll realize what a real bargain the 65  Lightning 2's are, even without the maintenance part of the deal. Or what a real screwing somebody took for those 3 heavy lifters.

If you knew the anything about the untried and overrated Lightning 2, you might realize, as well, that somebody was 'assuming the position', again.

Gord Save the Queen

It must have been some kind of serendipity to have our dear old Queen show up in Hogtown at the same time the other queens over on Jarvis were slapping the Dr. Scholl's moleskins on their parade blisters. I wonder if anybody thought to invite her to take part in the Dyke's Day festivities - she is such a role model for dominant personality types.

If she knew the other genders were having a alternation fest only blocks away, the dear old Queen wasn't saying anything about that for public consumption. It might not matter much, given the predilection of the royals to recognize, and use, the obvious organizational talents of the fey, even if they can't, officially, abide their amorous activities. Her majesty was reserved to royal business: a day at the races,  opening hockey displays, visiting blackberry factories and lunching with the 'natural nobility' of the province. They didn't have the security fences up for the delightful little monarch, she gets more respect than our 'worldly' leaders - except from 'excited' pony-owners. But she was there for them, to back them up, they are the pointy end of the family business don't you know? Extolling their virtues she would call it all, to the tune of only 12 million bucks. Worth every penny I say!.

She did get a little training for her up-coming visit to the land o' the free home o' the braves, etc. On her last days in Tronna she was the recipient of an early summer heat wave, combined with an exercise in applied private ownership when the power went out in the downtown core. Luckily, where she 'was to', there was a back-up electrical system and the the gala went on as planned. When she goes south next week, she's going to get a real baking, they've got that heat wave in spades compared to us esquimeaux, and an even wonkier private enterprise electrical grid.

The Americans are 'pumped' for her visit - but I think they're expecting Queen Latifah or a Freddy Mercury impersonator. An octogenarian as ruler better be wearing white and riding a popemobile as far as they're concerned. When it comes to 'royalty' they prefer those to be going 'commanda' and being undignified getting out of lo-rider limos. In the world of bad rugs, dental veneers and plastic surgery Queen Elizabeth looks just a bit too natural to be 'real'.

Editing a week or two post-visit, all I can note is that her Royal highness was upstaged by the tribulations of one Lindsey Lohan and the world Cup. I don't think anybody knew she was there.

Big Meetings

Ontari-ari-ario played host to the world's creme de la creme this week. Leaders of the leading G20 and the ultra elite leading G8 were here for their bi-annual readjustment. I would hope that, if nothing else, they had that drummer girl and the guy in the wheel chair out to sing the 'There's no place like this for meeeee...' song. Those world leaders would have been impressed. They got all the bums out from under the overpasses and off the sewer and subway grates for the meetings in the fortress of solitude they made out of downtown TO. And they paved and painted everything from the Airport at Huntsville - which now has enough gear to land a space shuttle, to the resort at Deerhurst. They even had trained anti-terrorist geese on the dock and down by the water. But the beaver in town was only for the cops.

Meanwhile,  down in the big smoke, them evil protesters - the Black Hundreds or 'bloc centimes', as they're called, biked in from the easter' province to do dirt in the streets of Tronna. While Toronto's finest were busy putting the boots to a bunch of sissies and girls in the park, those black basterds ran away up the street to bust things where the cops weren't. Pleece Chief Bert Winkledink , wearing his team tactical outfit, was a-huffin and a-puffin about this "never before seen" level of vandalism, and the outrage to the  citizenry and peaceful protesters and such. He wasn't saying anything about the phalanx of troopers who advanced 'swinging their batons and swearing' to rescue some flatfoot trapped in his squad car and then beating a tactical retreat while being forced to allow those 'betes noires' to play with the horn and sireen before setting the car on fire. The boys in blue abandoned a couple (4) of their units in the unexpected onslaught. Wonder why they didn't rescue the cars, too, by driving them behind pleece lines? It don't look good for the budget next time round if something don't get wrecked this time round, eh?

Just a thought, but maybe those black doofi are the latest application of applied Quebecoise pleece science. They know that, "Allons mes Gars! On aura les maudits anglais!" might not get the protestors all fired up, like it didn't last time, up their way. What the hell, whether you get to toss a rock or two, or thump a liberal, or not, it's all overtime anyhow!


One of the more notable additions were the RCMP, who showed up too late to get the good hotel rooms. They were to be bunked down in some sort of Hurricane Katrina complex.  "Well hold the donut Martha", said their union reps - they're unionized these days y'know,  "We'll be having a little more respect than that, if you please." And so a last minute search for decent digs ensued. They  probably  displaced the volunteers from the Chinguacousy Volunteer PD and a couple of other detachments of lesser lights. As it is, the senior pleece service got pride of place right out front with the doorman at the King Eddy and the Royal York.  Got a good close squint at them pols and their arm-flluff, too, I'd bet. Makes a fellah feel good, or better than one of those stupid judicial inquiries about tasers. All that was missing was an Afghan 'hero' , or two, going down to the coroner's office to be saluted. Even the black hundreds might have dropped the bandanna in the passing presence of somebody's kid who paid the ultimate whammy on behalf of their freedom to protest, and get clubbed and arrested in defence of democracy.


The Mayor of Toronto Dave Whiteman, the 'silver fox', came down on the evildoers and disinvited their welcome to his city. They weren't even welcome to grab a burger on their way out of town. The good protesters, though, could stay, but they had to stay good.

Humpty McGinty the premeer of  Ontario was 'on the wall' for allowing the Tronna pleece service special powers of arrest without telling anybody. "That's a dirty lie.", he told the press, "It's on the website for anybody who wanted to look, or at least it will be next week after the G20's over".  As if the Tronna pleece service needs any special permission to do anything Chief  Bill Bailey tells them to do. Could just see that: "Well Mr Preemeer. In order to guarantee that the black horde won't get away from us and burn things like pleece cars, I will be requiring special legislation to permit my troops to arrest anyone for nothing at all. The Mayor, I know, has an aversion to this 'pleece state' sort of thing, so I wondered if ....?"

"Eggs-ackly,  Chief Bill. Allow me to set you up right away. There is this interesting little law enacted during WW2 -  that's the BIG one private Ryan got saved in - to make this a better place and it was never repealed. It's called the 'dun the hun for freedom' law and we can use that to get the riff raff out of the way of the black plague. You go Boy!"

And so he went.

By the way, the only real accomplishment of the summits,  besides a huge bill and some great eats,  is a strongly worded message to Iran and North Korea - "Mr. Netanyahu, Take Down that wall!"  - No, that;'s not it. Wait a minute ..... eh......

Wear Red on Friday, the Scarlet French Letter

Canadian forces were shocked this week when the number one in Afghanistan Brig. Gen. Danny Menard was relieved of command only hours after he returned to his post from Canada. He had been away to answer charges of careless handling of his firearm, when he came close to permanently discharging his Commander Walt Natanczuk in a helicopter loading incident. He was fined $3 500 - most likely as an example to the troops, who have been known to fool around too much with their guns. But this isn't what got him relieved.

The story is that his other gun may have been involved. Apparently the good brigadier had a 'relationship' develop with a young female soldier on his staff. This was a serious breech of CF discipline which enjoins upon those in foreign deployments to such places as Afghanistan, a level of Shaolin Warrior Monkhood, or something. There is ab-so-lute-ly no panty-punching, or dicky-dunking allowed on CF bases in the Asian and middle eastern theatres of war. The Brigadier may have been hoisted on his own petard.

Soldiers expressed dismay at another black-eye for the service. We have a base commander in Canada cooling his heels in the slammer on a double charge of homicide. And now this, NATO's golden-haired spokesperson who bade a fond farewell to so many smiling soldiers, couldn't do what they did and keep it in his baggies. But if they're dismayed, imagine what the little woman waiting at home must be feeling - all those 'deployment widows'. If the Brigadier can be vamped by some little harlot in camo, what about the other fellows who don't get the trips out of theater for R&R, consultations and meetings? They'd like to be 'meeting' somebody, too, I'm sure.

So they figure that pretty well wraps things up for the Brigadier, all he has left is a faint hope that a court martial might think he didn't do anything. But failing that, he has a good career ahead in the private security industry, or in advertising.

Post Script: The latest is that Danny's a 'goner' not for his 'peckerdillo', but because he ordered her to dummy-up when the military police came investigating. It's that superior officer lese-majeste that will have Danny taking a supervisory position with Xe or Garda.

We'll Train the Police

 The Canadian military mission in Afghanistan comes to an end in 2011. After that the Canadians will be reassigned to training the Afghan police. That should be a snap, because Canada has been involved in training the Afghan Police for a number of years, now. How well have we done? We've done great!

 Has the program been successful? Not a chance!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gk2P2jBxZck&feature=player_embedded

 This Utube correspondent reports on the 'elite' Afghan police unit, ANCOP, which has been deployed in Marjah the area recently 'liberated' by the 'surge' forces. The same old problems, exacerbated by a couple of new ones, are glaringly evident. As in the 'bad old days' that gave rise to the Taliban, this unit are 'foreigners' amid the people they police. They don't even speak the same language. They're probably not welcome among the Pashtun. But, being as since they're armed, and backed by the Americans, they have a superior feeling of what policing means. It's not that they like what they're doing. For, as it says, the attrition rate for the unit is 67 percent with - well-trained police quitting to join the regular army.

 Why? It's because this 'SWAT' squad has developed a military reputation. So much so that, as the officers claim, they're deployed as front men for NATO forces and the Afghan army. And they're getting killed first.

So what does this mean for the future. If things go as they have gone for the past 8 years, and there is no indication that anything will be done differently, as the Canadian instructor says, "We've done everything wrong."

Doing the wrong thing is the last thing to be doing in Afghanistan. Like in medicine, it's better to do nothing, for doing the wrong thing only causes needless hurt and suffering, not to mention the waste of resources that could have been used for something else.

If, in the 8 years Canadians have been training police, and seeing the results they've seen, and not having been willing or able to change anything, even staying to go on  training police is a waste of Canadian resources. It would be better to leave half the money we spend  for them to use as they see fit. Even if somebody steals it, we would only look stupid, not wrong. And, boys and girls, as even our point people admit, 'We've done everything wrong' training Afghan police.

A Slam Dunk for Justis

14 down and two to go. Toronto's jihadi terrorists may be  getting their day in court but, in a series of guilty pleas, the justice of their cases remains firmly in the mind of their beholder. For, aside from reading the charges into the record, there has been precious little scrutiny of the evidence against them. That's the beauty of a guilty plea, it saves a lot of wear and tear on the presenter. It gives the distinct impression that, if nothing else, the evil 'perps' have seen some error in their ways.  That may be all right for the courts  but it leaves the sour taste that, if those jihadis were just a tad more 'on the ball', the outcome might have been somewhat different and those security forces now doing the high fives might have been wondering, 'What the F**k?', just like the rest of us.

The most recent to 'fess up' was one of the original characters.  He was convicted of importing illegal firearms. Fahim Ahmad made his appearance on the security radarscope  4 years ago when he, or one of the other two he was with, accidentally dropped some shooting irons they were transporting into Canada - right in front of the Border Service. Mind you, this was long before the days when Canada's Border Service was much more than a part-time-employment service for in-between-term university students.  But dropping pistols is 'up there' on attention-getting, even if you are on the look-out for American smokes or Japanese air conditioners.  Hard to believe but, after 4 years, Fahim is finally facing the music for something he can't deny doing. Maybe if authorities had acted faster, he wouldn't have had the chance to add the rest of the narrative - the stuff about northern Ontario training camps, target practice and the malarky about beheading all the tools in Ottawa. He's not, apparently, being convicted of trying to blow up the southern part of Toronto but he is tarred with that brush too.

Toronto Star writer Thomas Walcom explored the subject in a piece for his paper in June of 06, reproduced on the Prison Planet Bulletinboard (http://www.prisonplanet.com/articles/june2006/070606notter). His claims that the changes that have happened in the official 'story' since these birds were arrested, the one that has never been tested in court, leads him to belief that 15 of the 16 weren't terrorists by any stretch of the imagination. That story has changed over time - historical corrections no doubt.  But why plead guilty?

 That's the 64 thousand dollar question. To date the court sentence for those who were 'really guilty' (just one of them so far) was really stiff. So, either these guys have some really stupid lawyers being paid by the crown to slack it, or they're really guilty of the possibility that they might actually have been more intelligent and ruthless in practice than they were in reality. Or there's something in all of this that we don't know. My money's on the latter.

The Canadian legal system is the home of the deal. It seems such a natural way to attain justice. Cop a plea to something you're comfortable with and the court will cut you a break for 'being cooperative' - you wouldn't have been there if you weren't guilty of something anyway, eh? If you want to fight, they'll let you do that too, but at such a cost to yourself, that you'll be sorry you did,  unless you're a slimeball ex-cop who murdered somebody and is smart enough to know how to get a million and a half bucks worth of legal aid. Some people fare better in court than others, Fahim was not one of the better-farers, he was looking at life for a contested conviction. Being as since the others had all confessed ... well, who was going to believe he was an innocent ringleader.

The only 'innocent' was the cops' paid stooge who was on-board from the get-go, and he only got a paltry million and a half and a new life as a 'witness'.

So far there's not much to feel secure about. A bunch of cretins have pled guilty to mass stupidity. But it would have been worthwhile, after the massive investigation and all, to have had them duly convicted on the evidence and sent away for life.

Unless they didn't do it, eh?

It's all Over Now (but the Obits)

The Oliphant  inquiry, or whoever's, into the 'faux pas' of Canada's former Prime Minister Brian Mulroney and his 'partner' Karl Heinz (der buchbeinder) Schreiber, whimpered to a 14 million dollar close, yesterday, with the judge issuing his findings. It amounts to a two minute minor.


Bottom line: the Canadian government spent 4 million bucks (again) to pay Mulroney's lawyers while he defended his honour against impugnity. His ex-buddy, and chief witness, who was testifying, or so it seemed, to keep himself off a Lufthansa jet and out of a German jail, was 'blowing the whistle' and 'coming clean'. Not about the real stuff, mind you,  the Airbus slush fund and the offshore banking done by Brian's down east buddies, but the niggardly $275 000, or so, paid for sales services not rendered.

Mulroney copped to getting some of that money ($225 000) and accidentally, almost, forgetting to claim it as income. It was safe and sound in his sock drawer for a couple of years, eh?  But that was it, and he wasn't prime minister, and those armoured vehicles for the army looked like a good deal, and Schreiber had an honest face, an all. And the high dudgeon he felt when he realized he might have bedded-down someone less honourable than himself. Why it brought a tear to the eye!

Not as much a tear had he been paying his own lawyers' bill, I'm sure.

Schreiber couldn't  testify forever, and wouldn't testify about his retirement nest egg - the same one they couldn't prove Mulroney got through his pal Frank Moores. So, he was packed off to Germany for a speedy trial, a lot more speedy than the inquiry, and a lengthy jail term. He'll be a very old man when he gets to start celebrating the rewards of a life spent on the inside track, unless he has some young doxie helping him spend it. Maybe if something were to happen to the gnadige Frau.....

So the official results are:
   -It looks like Mulroney may have done something ''less than honourable. But was he a crook? Did he do unspeakable evil? Well, we're not going there. Mulroney is to be punished by having a legacy that, along with moving Canada ahead in a number of ways, (NAFTA being a biggie), he spent like a drunk from Shawinigan, looked out for number one, and took money from a two-bit German shyster. Canadians don't really give a shit any more. Trying to stick something to 'Lyin' Brian' has cost us millions more than we needed to spend on the asshole.

So, as Pharaoh said in the 'Ten Commandments' -" So let it be written, so let it be done."

 Done and over with. Nothing to do now but wait for the obits.

And the Pols Come Tumblin' Down

Steve Harper pulled the rug out from under his Minsiteress for the Status of Women - Helena Guergis - last night, and not without lots of good reasons and not before her time. One of Harper's cabinet skanks, Helena, and her 'bozo' Karim Abdul  - ex future prime-ministerial material - Jaffar have been getting it in the neck from the Libs and the press for some while now.

They've  been 'picked on' - but not without some substantially stupid input from themselves.

Looking like something out of a Bollywood spectacular, the 'Sheik of Araby' swept single mom Guergis off her size 10's and merged them into Ottawa's 'ultimate power couple'. In a town full of cheap rugs, dentures and hairplugs, Guergis and Jaffar hit the scene like Wayne and Schuster hit the Sullivan Show.  Except they weren't kidding.

 
Rahim Jaffar was the first to start to melt. On his 4th shift as an Edmonton MP, Jaffar was knocked-off by an NDP lightweight. Maybe his riding got the message that 'on the way up' meant he didn't have time to do his basic job. The second nail in his coffin resulted from a police spot check in his home area of Caledon, Ont. That stop resulted in serious charges of drunk driving and possession of cocaine. For a guy who took delight in accusing other pols of being 'soft on drugs', Jaffar was apparently in a bind. Never fear however! The episode cost him an admission that he was driving carelessly and a fine of $500.00. The drug and drunk charges were dropped.


That must have pissed a lot of people off and so, when the story of what Jaffar had been doing earlier on the night he was stopped came to light, the 'hue and cry ' was on again. It seems the young man on his way up had become a shill for the 'green industry' offering his services and knowledge of government,  to make sure his clients were steered toward the proper teats for government largesse. His business web site even bore the PC party logo until it was removed after the story came to light. Influence peddling would be an apt descriptor. And the smell attaching to the business 'clients' he was meeting that night was stronger than pungent week-old babaganouche and beer butts.


Helena was only slightly smarter. Her first gaffe occurred during an annoying airport security thing in PEI. She took offense to having to to remove her power boots and wigged-out on the staff. After the apology for that,  next thing was a series of letters to the editor praising her public probity and innate brilliance. They were written by her staff - without her knowledge of course. That is natural:

" Geez, Clarice, the electorate thinks I'm an asshole!"
" No boss, I know that to be untrue. You are hard-working and diligent.. I won't tell you that I will be spending my lunch, speaking truth to the power of the media."


Perhaps it was the thought that Jaffar was serious about his ability to make cabinet contacts for business on the mooch. He was cohabiting with one. That he was brazen enough to carry on as such, and that she was either naive enough, or cupiditous enough, to let him, explains why, after being removed from caucus she, and he, are the subject of a police investigation.

But the PC's aren't cruel by nature. There's her pension to think about. And why make a martyr out of one of your own? The day might well come when it's another Tory's business being sniffed, and one wouldn't want to set any nasty precedent.

Pervs and Perps

Big in the news this Easter is the scandal of pedophilia in the Catholic Church. That's the way it's described and the way most people seem to understand it, but the story should be reported as the problem with the way the Roman Catholic Church hierarchy has dealt with pedophilia in the Church. Statistically, there probably isn't as much of a problem with pedophilia as there might be in a less select population. But there have been some clergy with that propensity, and the way they have been 'dealt with' is now coming to light.

I would imagine a contrite Catholic pedophile, like a contrite murderer, or thief, or other sinner, coming for the absolution of the confessional, and receiving the same conditional absolution as any other penitent. The conditional part lies in the penance part. For, in most cases of sin, sorrow, atonement and restitution, if possible, as well as the firm intention to avoid such sin again, lie at the heart of forgiveness. A thief wouldn't get a 'by' to keep his ill-gotten gains; even if they were already disposed of,  restitution to the offended party remains part of the penance. In like manner, a civil penalty might also be inflicted. A murderer, say, while protected by the privilege of the confessional, would not find forgiveness until he surrendered and confessed to the law. Other than that, there is no real contrition. That someone might suffer from an illness causal to the behavior is not the bailiwick of the confessor, although knowledge of such would enhance the penitential aspect. The onus for forgiveness lies with the confessed, not the confessor. In like manner a pedophile seeking absolution would have more than the confessional dialogue to work through. A course of spiritual development to ensure there is no repetition, even a legal process, should be de rigeur.

That such Catholic pedophiles were part of the Holy Office adds another dimension. Such a moral failure in the light of whatever stresses of the vocation might have caused it, does not reduce the severity of it. Unlike a sexual dalliance with an adult, a relationship that uses children lies outside the pale, both social and theoretically, of the Curia. That such an individual might find absolution is understandable. That such an individual would be returned to his milieu without a rigorous moral reindoctrination, is simplistic at best, ludicrous at worst. The strength of the Holy Spirit lies in avoiding occasions of sin, not so much in an absence of recidivism. One failure should be all that is tolerated in terms of a failure of celibacy, no failure should be tolerated if it involves a child. Such a man might continue to serve as priest but not in the society of those who evoke his weakness. Not so much for his good, as for theirs.

But that doesn't seem to have happened in the church. The people have known of these things, and have been scandalized by these things but the hierarchy has been on the 'hush'! Those making complaint have been silenced by threat or blandishment. Those offended against have been reoffended by blame. Those weak vessels have been 'passed on' to other situations with no warnings or cautions. And some have reoffended without effective sanction either from religious, or lay powers. This is unacceptable and requiring acknowledgement and action.

The hierarchy of the church remains on the 'hush'. Refusing to submit to what it calls 'gossip' and refusing to examine what has gone on. In doing so, the hierarchy wounds the Body of Christ. The People of God are called to trust, not in the Divine Providence, but in the continued direction of those who have so abjectly failed in their Pastoral  duties. In a misguided attempt to maintain the majesty of the 'unblemished Bride of Christ', they have ministered to the wolf and ignored their flock. This lack is telling on the face of the Holy Father. He looks worn and haggard. If he failed as bishop he should acknowledge his failure and seek forgiveness. They say that confession is good for the soul, his too.

Like all confessions it need not be public. But what needs to be public is the church's condemnation of those who knowingly cause the little ones to sin. Jesus did no less.

Documentaries

Since Leni Riefenstahl put the nascent Third Reich on the map with "Triumph of the Will' back in the thirties, the documentary has maintained itself, not only as a form of propaganda but as an art form. That Mother Earth continues to have her troubles has only provided more opportunity for the cameraman - read to-day 'photo journalist'- to point the enlightening lens at things, that in years past, would have remained hidden. If the picture tells a thousand-word tale, then film or video can relate a saga. Where a picture can be staged, or edited or altered, live video is far more difficult (but not impossible) to fake. Particularly when it is taken in real time, out of doors.

How many world events have been affected by a photo, or by video? The assassination of a president captured by the home movie of an on-looker affected a generation. The moment a bullet was fired into the head of a bound captive gave the American public the notion that the war in Vietnam was not the clean war Look, Life  and National Geographic had been selling them. A host of live video in years to follow helped belie the claims of victory and a light in the tunnel. Vietnam was lost on the 6 o'clock news.

The lessons haven't been lost on the warfighters. 'Bad' - read a free and open - press can can damage a war effort by uncovering the bullshit with which such activity is normally festooned. And so, to-day, 'information operations' are every bit as important as strategy and tactics, for information often sets the stage, or defines and directs it.

One of the present's more notable 'information efforts' gone awry involves Fox News and retired Col. (and hero of the Contra wars) Oliver North. Two years back, Ollie , on a tour of western Afghanistan with a Fox News team in tow, had the opportunity to accompany a special forces unit on a raid on Afghan insurgents. The midnight visitation and the ensuing six hour 'battle' was, apparently, captured for posterity by the Fox News team. In the light of the next day the mistakes began to appear. The first was the large numbers of insurgent women and children killed in the Afghan compound, bombed by NATO aircraft after the raiders had reported being fired upon. Oliver North was among the first eyewitnesses denying that any women and children had been killed in a firefight with 'massive numbers' of insurgents. Unfortunately the Afghans had cameras too, and, within a day, UN representatives were documenting the carnage as well. It turned out, after initial denials and a lengthy investigation, that there had been some 'bad intel' that resulted in the deaths of 80 plus Afghans gathered for a family celebration. To add insult to injury, the dead male Afghans formed the main part of a native defense force contracted to guard a nearby US air base. Needless to say the video that would have corroborated Ollie's version of the incident was never released. The UN's photos were.

A case currently before a military court in the States was the subject of the movie 'Haditha'. A Marine sergeant is currently on trial for the manslaughter of a dozen or so Iraqis in a 'battle' that started when an American force, that had been 'frustrated' by insurgents hiding among the residents of the town, were struck by an IED which killed one of them. Shortly afterward, a car full of  'insurgents' (who later turned out to be university students) happened on to the scene. While these were being marshaled for interrogation, the Marines claimed they were fired-upon from a nearby house. When the six Iraqi men from the car started to flee. The sharpshooting Sgt. managed to drop every one of them. His unit then tackled the unseen insurgents hiding in the house. 'Prepping with hand grenades' as they went, the Marines 'fought' a room-to-room battle through one house and into two others in  pursuit of insurgents whom they never managed to see but still managed to engage. What they did engage however were a number of women, children and old men, only two of whom, a young brother and sister survived. The Marines suffered no casualties from all the reported gunfire. The movie portrayed the tale sympathetically as young men frustrated by war doing a little too much that left them shocked. The photos taken at the scene by one of the Marines, as well as an official record made the next day by a Marine photographer, and the concommittent photos and video released by the Iraqis, gave the impression that there was a good amount of latitude in the battle report and possibly some staging in the pictures. A photo of the first six dead shows them lying in a group near their car, they must have revivified for a later picture shows the corpses scattered.  The dead in the houses demonstrate the effect of the grenade prep, but some of the corpses showed an interesting pattern of  'accidental' gunshots, many between the eyes. To date charges have been withdrawn against all others involved.

There are some good documentaries out recently. An English photojournalist called Ross Kemp has done some excellent work with British forces in Afghanistan, an honest look at the life of a soldier. He has also done a couple of good recent programs on Gaza and Israel.

'The Lionesses' takes an unvarnished look at a handful US army women who were seconded to the Marines to assist in security problems involving female Iraqis. It depicts the unifying perspective of military service to the country as a public good, while making note of the fact that such service often derives from economic necessity and, in the case of such women, can be more destabilizing of family life and equally as traumatic on a personal level. The "Lionesses" were an afterthought in the cakewalk that turned into the Iraq of to-day.

An HBO effort 'Baghdad High' made in 2007 lets 4 Iraqi high-schoolers tell part of their story through the use of video cameras loaned to let them document their lives. Along with the normal high school existence - friends and studies, interests and loves, there is the backdrop of a Baghdad spinning out of control where the air is filled with the train-roar of helicopter engines. Shooting and explosions happen all too regularly and the increasing danger leads to increased security measures - even at school with some of the boys considering leaving school altogether. At the end of the film we are told that two boys have graduated and one of them is at university, the other can't afford it.  Of the others one has failed and quit, the fourth is repeating his year. Amazing that these young men are so  much like ourselves.

'Taxi to the dark Side' is a classic of the genre. A docudrama,  the film tells the story of  one Afghan, who through a fluke of fate and location, winds up a suspected insurgent in Bagram prison. The experience there was to take his life. But the investigation that resulted opened the book on the 'enhanced interrogation techniques' that also sullied the Iraq experience.

'Brothers in War' tells the story of a young American Army officer and his 'photo-journalist ' brother who follows him to Iraq to document his service there. The story also explores the relationships on the home front with parents, wives, families and girlfriends.

If the Vietnam war was well-documented - indeed as as claimed, 'lost' by the negative images it generated, then the 'Asian Wars' of the new millennium, too, will have their tales to tell. With the exception that, if they are lost, the loss can't be laid at the doorstep of a society misled by an antagonistic press.

Bob Foul-er

The Liberals have been having a focus-session this week, trying to get on their pins again after 'Wolfie o' the North's latest gaffe. To do that,  they had invited a number of  'doers and thinkers' to address the party hacks with a view to acquiring a new 'vision'. With the exception of Bob Fowler, they might have been better advised to do a week on water and colonics in some 'cleansing' ashram.

Of all the ruminators, Bob Fowler's forty minutes really gave the Libs something to think about.

 Bob  Fowler is the Canadian who was ambassador to Teheran when the Shah n Shah's balloon went up, back in the days when the Ayehtolleh was Khomeini, rather than Khameini. That little bit of 'Jamie Bondism' garnered Fowler the 'respect' of the Americans and a posting as ambassador to Washington. After he stepped-down from Canada's foreign service. Bob Fowler 'took up' with the UN. In this role he was kidnapped last year in Niger and held for a few months by the AlQaeda (viz bandit) organization there. In  all his travels and works, Bob Fowler has gained a perspective on many of the current trends of history. Unfortunately he's a little out-of-synch with the conventional wisdom displayed in Ottawa and Washington these days.

Bob Fowler, with a nod to the Canadian government efforts to gain his release, chastised the Conservative government for squandering what good will had been gained for Canada in Africa by changing the focus of Canada's foreign aid to Afghanistan. He also pointed out that, no doubt due to having to pay for a war there as well, the Conservatives had failed to reach Canada's promised GNP/aid ratio. That wouldn't matter anyway, as CIDA would be pumping the boodle into more 'model villages' and non-operating maternal health (abortion and birth control) centres in Kandahar City.

But Bob Fowler dropped a bombshell on the Libs, one that they aren't ready to do anything about. He charged that they were pandering to special interest groups in order to get elected. The biggie was the 'I love Israel' special interest group that forms the bed rock of all three (four) Canadian political parties. This love for the Holy Land, Fowler charges is at the root of many of the problems in the world to-day. The west's backing of Israel, and its consequent intransigence in reaching a peaceful settlement of the Palestinian Arab problem, is the nub of all the anti-western perspectives in the Muslim world. Actually it's the second nub. For the first remains America's notion  that the 'free market' needs to be taken to the middle east and central Asia for the benefit of American interests. 'Playboy after Dark' and American 'culture' had as much to do with the rise of the Taliban and Islamic fundamentalism, as did the occupation of east Jerusalem. But the Palestine problem is one that all Muslims can understand and the Zionists have been fairly stiff-necked in seeing that perspective broadcast abroad.

For Ignatieff, as for Harper, Layton and, possibly, Duceppe the Jewish lobby is very close to home, if not actually in residence. Prominent members of all parties are of the Jewish persuasion and very few of them are not synoptic with the middle east's only 'democratic' atomic and military power. For Canada to go back to the days of the 'honest broker ' - a view never shared by Canada's military peace-keepers, by the way - in middle eastern affairs, would, to-day, be considered a hearty stab-in-the-back by Benny Natanyahu, if not by the White House. But Fowler has definitely called the kettle black and it remains to be seen if anybody will act on this notable political differentiation. More than a few Canadians worry about Israel's propensity and apparent ability, to involve the west in its police actions, wars and security fears. Fowler's words have made him a target for the ADL and the letters to the editor as well as the local pols, from 'grass-roots Canadians',  are, no doubt, in the mail. No 'anti-semite' hate stuff , yet. Just some 'elitist' commentary by a  Hebrew on the Ottawa Citizen. But it has been a slow sort of week.

"There are some things I disagree with", pontificated an awakened 'Wolfie', "but Bob Fowler has earned the right to say them." Geez, ya gotta love the free speech we have in Canada. In less civilized lands somebody would be lining up to drill him. But in Canada he'll be quietly ignored. It's a cinch he won't be getting nominated to run Liberal in any riding in Canada, even if there's a groundswell of public support. Neither will his views be considered.

American Wummin

Anne Coulter is in the news north of the 49th. She's visiting the GWN to save 'real' Canadians from the dusky masses and welfare bums - and she's not getting a fair chance to get the word out. And that's offendink the wank artists and yarmulkeh weavers who've invited her here, I would imagine in an effort to get some good upskirts, or a shot of her bodacious tat-tas from just that 'perfect' angle. Although what's so 'hot' about her is beyond me but it couldn't be for her 'wit'. She sounds like an effeminate jock bullshitting in the locker room - the humour is about that level, too.

At first glimpse one might imagine the scrawny clapped-out wagon marms who hiked across a continent before dropping a passel o' young 'uns in a log hut she built by herself while her man Zeke rested-up with the moonshine jug and recharged his degenerative powers. One might just as easily envision her as a 'tobaccy rosey' on some hilbilly farm pulling the plow across stony fields when the mule was lost in a stock swindle, or Missus Joad suckling a neighbor chile  .... nah,  Ann would have to be the cub reporter watching that and complaining about how the market economy could be better utilized by po' folk. Actually it would be just as easy to envision her scalped and mutilated by a Pawnee war party because she wouldn't keep her big mouth shut, and to envision the cavalry wiping out the hostiles with 'remember Ann Coulter' on their lips and a tear on their cheek. Annie is quite some piece of American 'art'.

Ann, and her 'backers', the fey blades of the young Conservatives, are miffed because somebody pulled the plug on her spew at the U of Ottawa after the Dean warned her to be careful, and a bunch of 'unfriendlies' got her going at a kick-off lecture. She should have started off as she does at American universities, but then I don't think she speaks at that 'kind' of university. The minds she wants to address don't need to think, they just do as they're told - by Bob Jones, Oral Roberts Junior or whatever other latter day Profit who sees himself setting up a 'paradigm of Christian higher learning'. She wouldn't want to start calling names at most of the Ivy Leagues, or even State colleges these days, as the dusky Americans and those with almond-shaped eyes are gaining the majority. Even in a land of  'free speech' I couldn't see her getting away with her 'wisecracks'. It's just a good thing she comes across as high-class white trash, if she was black somebody might have 'offed' her already.

Anyway, Ann was offended enough by the "whiners" to threaten to launch a human rights action herself - that goes beyond the whining her acolytes were doing. Somebody even suggested in a paper to-day that Ann "deserves to be heard". I think she has the right to say anything she wants - even offensive stuff. But I think my right to not listen to her trumps that. She has no right to be 'heard' - except by those who want to, and they, too, have no right make me listen - or to use public support to enable it. User pays - that's a concept they are familiar with. That includes renting an auditorium and not using free accommodation at a publicly funded university, college or a school by calling her crap 'educational'. It's as educational, if not as hilarious, as a buttful of MacLean and MacLean and they have to pay, so does she.

Ann has moved west to a part of Canada reserved by God and nature to the white race and those who think American. But if the faces I was seeing on the coverage of the last Olympics were any indication, Ann might need a sonderbataillion of sturmtruppen at her next 'free speech' event. Otherwise she's just apt to have to spend all her time getting sassy with some uppity ragheads, or burqah bimbos. She obviously has some cute camel toes to share.

Well, Blow! Blow! Blow Me Down!

In a previous blog I had remarked on how well the sports psychologists had prepped Canada's athletes for the upcoming contest. I'd also noted how many of the athletes were bumming and blowing about owning stuff - the sport, the slopes, the gold.

One of those cracked-up to be a real contender was a chap called Osborne-Paradis who claimed to know the slopes at Whistler better than anybody else on earth. All he had to do he claimed was pick out his course within the boundaries and down the slope and 'by gar' them Postes Canada better have that new stamp about Canadian gold rolling of the presses with his champion's grin front and centre.

                                                                    Osborne-Paradis

Well it seems that fate or bad manners or something,  put a "bump" in this wunderkind's progress, and being as he hadn't noticed it before, it almost knocked him out of the race completely. So we should all be eating maple leafs to-day rejoicing in the fact that his 17th place finish should line him up good for the 2014 games.

Like, I know I shouldn't be cracking-off about those who do while I don't,  but  there's a certain amount of shit blowing around these days telling you you're less of a Canadian if you're not supporting our athletics or chipping in a donation to help 'sports'  at  Zellers. Just like I don't support General Rick, or any of the other troops  who think that they're in Afghanistan to kill a 'scumbag' for me, I don't support the fatuous 'aces' who talk a great game and then fail to place. Unlike me, they're afforded a lot of  free time, facilities and public support to represent themselves and, vicariously, the rest of us, doing something they at least claim to love doing. But spare us the hot air. Be humble and do your best. If you ain't bragging you've got my support. If you show yourself to be a good sport, you've got it in spades - even if you don't win anything.

Osborne-Paradis has one more event in this Olympics. Maybe this embarrassment will help him shut-up, focus and, maybe, do better. But I doubt it. Blaming a bump for not being able to handle a bump says something about character that tends describe the 'loser'.

PS  Can you spell hubris - he blew his last chance, too. Maybe he'll be a better man for it, but I'd watch the drinking.

Lessons from Camp

On Sunday, February 7, a full-page ad ran in the New York Times. It was paid for by the Eli Weisel  Foundation for Humanity and subscribed by a number of Nobel Laureates.  In the ad these great minds called for rigorous sanctions against Iran, which country they described as  a nuclear threat to the world  and a nation waging a "shameless war against its own people". Such were the threats made against Saddam Hussein's regime that led to the  destruction  and eventual invasion of that country.

On the face of it, this appeal is given as the voices of reason calling out for the preservation of world peace, mankind or some other lofty goal. But in the absence of any provable truth to the two basic charges, and aside from political rhetoric there is absolutely no physical proof that Iran is either of its descriptors. In fact there is much to indicate the opposite.

So why, then, would such great human minds lend themselves to such an appeal? They must really believe what they are saying is true, and the sanctions they call for effective. The advertisement leaves both points unexamined.

As to the first point Iran's 'nuclear ambitions'. Iran is, for that part of the world, a unique signatory to the United Nations Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty. This instrument was signed by the government of the Shah no doubt with the understanding that his government would operate under the shelter of America's nuclear deterrent. Even as the neighboring Israelis, Pakistani's and Indians developed their nuclear arsenal in spite of the UN and American protection, or when the Iraqis started down the same road, no protest was uttered by Teheran about threats to themselves or anybody else. Indeed America saw no inherent dangers there. In all this the Iranis stayed strictly within the bounds of the conventions they had signed. Even after the theocracy came to power, and even after a protracted and bloody war with Iraq, Iran stayed well within UN constrictions regarding development of nuclear power sources.

So why are the laureates concerned? Well, for one thing, Iran has not been amenable to American influence for some time. What little influence remained after the Islamic Revolution diminished in the light of Iraq's US-supported attack on the Islamic Republic. A second reason is the little-disguised abhorrence of the Zionist polity in the Middle East. Iran is far from alone in decrying the actions of  Zionists and their effects on the people who were inhabitant of the former Palestine. But Iran is unique in being open and honest about this - to the point of stating that the Zionist regime is in need of a change. Laureates like other 'good jews' - who are normally very humane, peaceful and long suffering - can put their gentle angels aside to thwart a threat (real or imagined) to the Jewish 'promised' land. The laureates, like many Americans and Israelis, see Iran as a regional  adversary at best and a loose nuclear cannon at worst.  Very few of the countries which might suffer most from a nuclear Iran - Iraq, the Gulf States, Russia, Pakistan, Afghanistan, or a number of central Asian Republics are as concerned about Iran's actions, or objectives. Europe is split on the issue, Russia and China remain moderately supportive of Iran. Laureates and humanists in few other countries have taken this 'threat' to heart.

The Laureates also charge the government with warring on its own people. Would to God they would raise their voices about some nations who shamelessly war on other nations' people. There is a body of law supportive of internal restraint to riotous, rebellious or even revolutionary populations - just look at what's happening on behalf of the 'legitimate authorities' in Afghanistan and Iraq. And no laureates are griping about that.  The Iranians have at least put the 'people' they are at war with on a trial of sorts. They have their day in court and the trials are covered by the media. But there are a dearth of private security prisons, few black ops, prolonged detentions without trial, renditions, disappearances or any of the 'civilized methods' for dealing with 'enemies' that have become so much a part of Israel and America 'under siege'. And yet the Laureates have been otherwise engaged for the past decade, and took no notice, nor any time to comment, nor any paid advertisements?

Eli Wiesel is an eloquent voice of the Holocaust. To him is ascribed the notion that indifference can lead to another Holocaust.  But his times should have demonstrated to him that the Shoah may have been the Jewish experience, but the holocaust belongs to all humanity. Whether one dies in some demented racially-driven killing industry, or falls victim to a war of aggression,  makes little difference to the innocent. Wiesel's experience since  1945 should have shown him that 'holocausts' are subjective, and very easily repeated. The only solution for them is not the kind of  'difference' that imposes more suffering, but the kind of love and unity, tolerance or humility that never seem to be part of the repertoire of the powerful. If Elie Wiesel and his laureate friends wanted to really do something to engender world peace, and not assist in providing a philosophical base for new aggression, they should have castigated all sides and volunteered to act as honest brokers in resolving the differences politicians seem unable to approach, let alone solve.

That such eminent thinkers might consider that sanctions will effectively bring the Iranian hound to heel is little more surprising than the current 'Democrathink' that another stiff, little 'shock and awe' surge will force the Afghan Taliban to cease trying to liberate their homeland, take Uncle Sam's dollar and, possibly, join with their Iraqi brothers to 'spread democracy' into Iran. The latter may be slightly extrapolated, but should Afghanistan come 'onside' why not as the spearpoint of the free market in Asia? Problem is, both notions are patently incorrect. Iraq won't be invading anywhere for a while and with the majority Shiite population in control, it won't be east. Afghanistan is still another decade from any solution. And sanctions where they have been, or still are (as in Gaza and the west bank) being  practised, have proven to be politically ineffective while alienating to the 'ordinary people' democrats or peace groups might want to approach.

Wiesel and company's myopia serves the cause of humanity not a whit. Sometimes the learning of the concentration camp can be far too narrow a field.